Chest of Treasure - Random Thoughts

 

Many times, I think why I have been so grumpy, why I am so different from others, why I am like 'I don't give a f--k' kind of person

Why am I not a normal kind of person, but what is normality?

Big question, ah!ha!

May-be I think they are normal and they, they think I am normal, it can be both ways.

And, I wonder who are these 'they' ?

Now-now so hence, I am normal ! Thank God

I am collector, in fact think everyone is bit of a collector. We collect-collect things as good memories and then once in a blue we find them and cherish them. 

These things are our memories, whenever I clean or re-arrange my almirah I find my memories and feel good as they are part of me, the part of me that no one knows. 

Something that belong to me. 

Cherish with Big Smile 😊💭

So, today was the one of those days when I spend some time (somewhat more time) to clean and re-arrange my almirah and, and vola!, cleaning the almirah I am sure everyone feels like opening a chest of treasures. I was drenched with nostalgic feeling.

Found many things I forgot, I had, spend some good amount of time on each one of it and then came the part of rearranging them so, many things were shown dustbin and other which I have not used since last six months were given away.

Then made a cup of tea and while sipping tea I came to moment where I was taken down the memory lane by all the things that I discovered in my treasure. 

Let me take you to journey of few things and a story behind it, as they say ' everyone has a story'

'Lehenga' for my doll : 

Don't remember maybe I was in my early twenties, I choose to dedicate my spare time to crafting, and I was living in the remote area so I designed this with a thought that one day I will buy a doll and dress her in Indian Lehnga. 

And, yes, I do complete this and kept at the safe place, where over the period of time I also forget about. 

So it is kind of reappearing after twenty years and still I have to buy a doll and still I have to design and make other parts of the dress. 

But, now I think I am done with buying dolls and making dresses so I will let it go, maybe next month. Hope I wont forget about it. will put reminder, so this will go back into my chest of treasure, maybe someday when I will again discover this I can think of something else.

Or, if in case I die then it will be someone else's problem. 

Life 😊

Hair rollers:

I was one of those kind who had strict father and I use to dream about growing up and using all the beauty product and equipment. And one day I bought 'Hair rollers' for myself, hashtag to be used when I grow-up.

But, I never used them as I never learnt how to use them, never tried also as I don't want to look like 'girl with spikes' .

I still posses this memory and every time I take them out, I try them and after another failed attempt I put them back, in a cloth bag, to be taken out and to be tried some other day.

In between I had gone through phases of 'Hair Straining', 'Hair Smoothening' and Hair rebounding'.

Okay by for now Hair Rollers, back in the treasure chest 👋

Pokemon - Jigglypuf:

Now-now, very interesting possession. Pokemon toy. In fact its a soft ball which transforms into Jigglypuff. 

Again credit goes to my father, he was against watching TV, according to him TV is like 'Tamsic Food' that as its said in Ayurveda 'consumption of Tamsic food leads to destruction of Mind and Body.

So, I was again one of those who was barred from seeing Television. But, when I got access to watching television I went berserk, as soon as I was free I was in front of the television watching cartoons was my favourite, maybe that child in me was awaken.  

So, the day I laid my eyes on the Pokemon soft toy, I just grabbed it and since then we are together. 

Special One :

One more thing is in my possession and that is bit of revenge kind. My grandmother was very cute, although she was a rich lady but she always use to give one rupee note to all her grand children. Before giving a rupee note she use to say, 'I have fifteen grand children, I can afford a rupee only for everyone, and collect this rupee notes and you can be rich one day'. But I kept that rupee note as revenge souvenir to show it to my children and grand children, like, 'see what we use to get and what you guys are getting'. 

Funny, as I also forgot about it and discovered it just last month after almost twenty years. When I rediscover rupee note, revenge had no place left just a gratitude that how lucky we are to have Grandmother, who was living with us.

Blessed are who have memories, in the form of things, which we can cherish all our life.

Odd days

 

Odd days (Part-2) :

Was meeting Anuj after long time. Last time when we met we had young fire burning inside us, we were young and free, we were us only, no one was there to stop us. 

Today I was meeting him after long six years, I thought its gonna be magical, the moment I will lay my eyes on him I will be all over him. Anuj and my relation was beyond anything and everything, no promises, no commitments, no sticking to each other kind of rules but then too we were together, kind of inseparable also.

Anuj and I met eleven years back and it was like 'like at first site' kind of thing. we met, numbers were exchanged and we met again and all there was between us was fire and fire, no questions asked just fire and fire. 

Sometimes I think that way it was good, no promises, no commitments and no expectations and no attachment, but the attachment that we had was beyond words. Every time we met it was like fiery but I was never eager to meet him but the moment we met we were like inseparable.

We never talked about our feelings or our future, every time we talk, it was about meeting when and where.

And, one day I just fainted in the bus while I was coming back from work and that very day I woke-up from the world of my dreams, the world of me and Anuj was indeed dreamworld, the moment I opened my eyes in the hospital I realised it was over, our world of dream was shattered and broken pieces of our shattered world were only gonna leave us bruised forever. 

I was not able to contact him as I was not allowed to call him. first time in our 'so called' relationship I realised that Anuj was dream, for me at least. 

Odd days continued - next day he called and told me when we were meeting next and I said 'okay', I never told him what I went through and where I was, first time in our relationship I realised he never, technically asked me where I was.

Odd days continued - today after the gap of six years Anuj and I were meeting again. I thought about the fire that we had and all I was getting back from my feeling was 'scepticism'.

But, wait, why, why I was not getting any vibes, where that fire went. Are all relationship connected with a delicate thread and once it breaks, it cannot be mended.

And the moment was here, he was there, I could have jumped into his arms, but my feelings were dead. Dead, wait what, just a moment back I was thinking about him, his hugs and his kisses and now all those feelings just vanished into thin air.

Same air once carried away our vibes, vibes that brought us together, same air was pushing us apart.

Anuj's eyes were same, his looks were same but he was not. That Anuj that I had in my thoughts, he was not him. Maybe hospital did surgery on me, the part of Anuj was operated out of me. 

He was talking, and talking and I was all lost, lost in my thoughts. He was talking but I. I was looking for my Anuj, and next I remember is I was in the cab and Anuj was far-far away from me. 

We were still in the same world, same country, same city but we were like millions and millions of miles away. 

Now all I think was what was that part of my life was or was it part of my life or just a dream.

I still message him, but, when he replies, its like no this is not from that Anuj.

Feelings are timely like happiness, a moment of happiness feels like lifetime happiness but its just momentary and yes Love is same feels like something that will last forever but truth we 'fall in Love' and when wake-up we 'get-up' and get going and Love, Love is left behind and feelings vanish in the thin air. 

#randomtjoughts #odddays #hearttoheart